My latest screenplay is finished. It’s been spelling and grammar checked, reviewed by some trusted people, registered with the WGA. It is currently the best it can be. It is unique, has mass appeal, and the potential is obvious. I think so, anyway. The next step is a tough one – I need to get a producer to read it and to do that I need to pitch it to him/her with a high concept logline and synopsis.

Okay, that’s cake. Simple. Just come up with a single one-liner that will capture a producer’s attention with minimal word count and maximum impact. Then have a tight but descriptive synopsis as a follow-up.

First thing I do now is panic. So if you’ve come to me looking for some great words of advice or sage wisdom, you’ve knocked on the wrong door in the wrong neighborhood. My bona fides are that I’ve had three novels and over 70 short stories and non-fiction articles published and I co-wrote a screenplay that was optioned. Yep, I was paid real option money for a screenplay. The option lapsed and the movie was never made but I was in the door. For about one minute. In Hollywood, I’m unknown and unproven and, sometimes more than I like to think, unwelcome.

Back to the task at hand - I have to come up with a pitch that will get a producer intrigued enough to want to take my screenplay home over the weekend with the three dozen other screenplays he has to review. Once there the screenplay will have to stand on its own but the right pitch will get it added to the stack.

The next thing I do is go to Google. Type in “High Concept Pitches” and 307,000 freaking results pop up that include those three words. I read that the pitch should be one sentence, one to three sentences, 25 words or less, use other movies as reference points, don’t use other movies as reference points, you should instantly be able to see the whole movie, I should buy this man’s self-published book on the art of pitching, I should attend this woman’s seminar on pitching in Hollywood being held in Butte, Montana next week.

Pitches for movies based on books, news articles, biographies, graphic novels, old TV series, computer games, and amusement park rides won’t help. Although inspired by recent news stories and factual research, this is an original work.

What are some good pitches that worked? It doesn’t matter whether I liked the movie or not. The pitch got the screenplay read and a movie was made and that is the important item at the moment.

Let’s take a look at some pitches:

“Snakes on a Plane” – that is a terrific title and a terrific pitch. It tells you exactly what you need to know about this particular screenplay. The title was going to be changed but when actor Samuel L. Jackson found out he said, "We're totally changing that back. That's the only reason I took the job: I read the title."

Some other pitches are:

“JAWS in outer space” – “DIE HARD on a bus” – “DIE HARD on a U.S. naval aircraft” – “in a world where technology exists to enter the human mind through dream invasion, a highly skilled thief plans his toughest job” - “while flying over the Atlantic ocean, a woman’s daughter vanishes and nobody admits she was ever on the airplane” - “a young man living in the projects wins a lottery worth $370 million” – “a classic fairytale collides with modern-day New York City when a fairytale princess is sent into our world by an evil queen” – “the secret life of toys when people are not around”. Some good examples here.

Okay, enough with research. I could spend more time researching than it took to write the screenplay. Time to gather my notes and thoughts.

The screenplay is titled Borderland. It is an action-adventure story. More accurately it’s a shoot-‘em up. It was inspired by recent news stories in Arizona. So the story is topical and I think it’ll be topical for quite a while to come. I did a lot of research for the story but it is not a documentary or an editorial. All right, it may have a couple of opinions expressed but it’s basically a men-with-guns tale where some stuff gets blown-up real good.

Basic plot: In the desert, along the U.S/Mexico border in Arizona, a four-person National Guard fire team goes on patrol with a veteran Border Patrol officer and a news reporter. After arresting two illegal aliens, a young sister and brother, they encounter a group of hardcore drug smugglers. Major gun battle occurs and our heroes capture a drug captain and 200 million dollars in cocaine. But the last of the smuggler gang and the people the drugs were being delivered to come after them.

Do I feature the desert setting in my pitch? One character has a pretty good line I could use: The desert has its own laws and doesn't care whether you're man or beast, good or bad … break them and you die.

Or use an oldie but goody: Ripped from today’s headlines.

Maybe stress the main character: National Guard Sergeant Michael Cooper survived two tours in war-torn Afghanistan to meet his deadliest adversary at home.

Maybe I should condense the basic plot outline down to 25 words or less:

In the desert, along the U.S/Mexico border in Arizona, a National Guard team goes on patrol with a veteran Border Patrol officer and a news reporter and encounters hardcore drug smugglers.

A bit on the passive side. Goes on? Encounter? Is that the best words to use? C’mon, try again. Use active words this time.

How about: National Guard. Border Patrol. Drug smugglers. The Arizona desert will run with blood before the day is done.

Not quite there yet. Put all the ideas together and see how it looks.

Logline: Sergeant Michael Cooper survived two tours in war-torn Afghanistan to meet his deadliest adversary along the U.S./Mexico border.
 
Well, nothing’s in stone but that’s it. That’s my high concept pitch. Now I “just” have to write a professional and short query letter and organize a list of producers who might be interested. More cake. Nothing to it. Which shelf did I leave panic on?